******STOP THOSE SPOILERS!******
“Stop! That! Train!” is a railway-based, drag queen led-redux of the Abrams/Zucker Bros comedy, “Airplane!” (1980); one of my personal favorite comedy movies of all time.

President Judy Gagwell (RuPaul) dashes to the rescue of attendants Deedee (Jujubee) and Tess (Ginger Mini) and all others aboard the Glamazonian Express…
The movie was created by writing partners Christina Friel and Connor Wright (“The Bitch Who Stole Christmas”) and directed by Adam Shankman, a veteran music video director who’s directed such varied projects as the TV series “Glee,” the 2007 remake of “Hairspray” and “Disenchanted” (2022). With famed “Drag Race” judge/producer and 14 time Emmy Award-winner RuPaul (“The Brady Bunch Movie”) both acting and coproducing, it’s safe to say the creatives behind this flick know a thing or two about high camp…
“Stop! That! Train!” (2026)

Recently fired from “Stank Rail,” attendants Tess (Ginger Minj) and DeeDee (Jujubee) consider faking their way aboard the Glamazonian Express.
Note: Ginger Minj and Jujubee were both former contestants on coproducer/costar RuPaul’s Drag Race. Drag is true performance art–a heady combination of risqué burlesque and kabuki–yet both performers prove to be likable actors as well, giving deliberately broad yet sincere comedic performances as the two girls who quietly step up to work for Glamazonian Railways.

Tess and DeeDee make their own uniforms and take their act to the Glamazonian Express.
Note: My wife and I were surprised to see that the movie’s train station in the opening scenes was indeed L.A. Union Station in downtown Los Angeles; a locale famously used in “Blade Runner,” “To Live and Die in L.A,” “The Dark Knight Rises,” and many other movies and TV shows. Sadly, very few movies can afford to shoot in Los Angeles these days for expense and logistical reasons, yet this low budget film (under $20 million) manages to use the impressive cinematic location twice–both as itself and as its sister station in Florida.

Ali (Marcia Marcia Marcia), Amber (Brooke Lynn Hytes) and Ayshleiygh (Symone) send the new girls to coach.
Note: Like the movie’s two leads, drag artists Marcia Marcia Marcia, Brooke Lynn Hytes and Symone were all contestants on RuPaul’s Drag Race, and give appropriately over-the-top villainess performances as Glamazonian Railways’ territorial trio of Mean Girl attendants. “Marcia Marcia Marcia” is the famously frustrated catchphrase of anguished middle child Jan Brady (Eve Plumb) from TV’s “The Brady Bunch,” and coproducer/star RuPaul also played Jan’s school guidance counselor in 1995’s “The Brady Bunch Movie,” which was an instant camp classic. In the film, Jan was played pitch-perfect by Jennifer Elise Cox.

Sarah Michelle Gellar plays a version of herself who isn’t recognized or respected anywhere she goes.
Note: Put-upon horror icon Sarah Michelle Gellar (who’s only credited as “A Famous Actress” in the credits) is perhaps best known for playing the titular role in TV’s “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” (1997-2003), as well as her roles in the horror movies “I Know What You Did Last Summer” (1997), “Scream 2 ” (1997) and the American remake of “The Grudge” (2004). In a movie littered with cameos such as singer-guitarist Charo (“The Love Boat”), reality star Nichole Richie (“This Simple Life”), actresses Raven-Symoné (“The Cosby Show”), Lisa Renna (“Real Housewives of Beverly Hills,” “Melrose Place”) and actor Jesse Tyler Ferguson (“Modern Family”), Gellar stands out.

Train controller Donna Dusk (Rachel Bloom) realizes the Glamazonian is headed for the perfect storm of perfect storms. Meanwhile, her new coworker Barbara (Latrice Royale) sure gets around…
Note: It’s in the middle act where the Glamazonian Express hits a few loose rails. The scenes in the control center (an homage to the control tower scenes in “Airplane!”) go on a bit longer than necessary, slowing the middle act’s pace, as mousy railway controller Donna Dusk, played by comedian Rachel Bloom, realizes the train is headed straight for a storm of comically Biblical proportions–as none of her male chauvinist colleagues can muster a single shit to give. Through a freak electrical strike, the train’s brakes are fried (literally, of course), while the lead conductor-with-a-checkered-past (Chris Parnell) is incapacitated after a passenger’s “comfort scorpion” roams free and bites him (hate it when that happens…). SNL veteran Parnell is also known for his voice acting in “Rick and Morty” (2013-present). Parnell’s kinky conductor is similar to Peter Graves’ perverted “Captain Oveur” in the two “Airplane!” movies.

President Judy Gagwell (RuPaul Charles) confesses to her Press Secretary (Matt Rogers) that she once ran over a child in a runaway train when she was part of the US Railway Force–that other branch of the military…
Note: Enter RuPaul, and the movie steps up its game. As the reigning queen diva of drag, RuPaul owns every scene she’s in, even when performing admittedly goofy, “Airplane!”-style sight gags. Her confessional to her Press Secretary (Matt Rogers) as she recounts her ‘traumatic’ days of service in the “Railway Force” are all performed with tongue firmly in-cheek. My wife and I saw RuPaul in person at an event in Los Angeles about seven years ago, and if the phrase ‘star power’ ever applied to anyone–actor or not–it’s her.

After a pep talk with Donna, President Gagwell makes like a superhero to save the passengers and crew of the Glamazonian. But first, she has to cut a bitch down to size.
Note: President Gagwell makes a superhero-style entrance aboard the Glamazonian. I couldn’t help but notice the movie is listed on Fandango as an “action comedy,” which is like calling “Blazing Saddles” a whimsical western. Nothing in this movie is meant to be taken remotely seriously.

With both of the train’s conductors Davenport (Chris Parnell) and Cal (Brian Jordan Alvarez) taken out of action, President Gagwell faces her ‘hot-flashbacks’ to take the controls to save the day.
After the thirst trap co-conductor Cal (Brian Jordan Alvarez) is blown away by the storm in an attempt to activate the train’s ridiculously-placed rooftop emergency brake, President Gagwell is forced to take the controls of the runaway train. This triggers “hot-flashbacks” of when Gagwell killed a little girl on a railroad track. As we saw with the opening credits, the movie’s flashbacks also use hilariously antiquated stock railroad footage–a gag directly inspired by the war flashbacks of Ted Striker (Robert Hays) in 1980’s “Airplane!”, which used stock footage from World War 2 and even experimental flights from the early 1900s to tell the backstory of its thirty-something pilot. Actor Brian Jordan Alvarez created & stars in his TV series “English Teacher,” and also costarred in the 2022 cybernetic horror movie, “M3GAN.”

The Glamazonian screeches to a halt–just before it would’ve struck a child who happened to in a wheelchair on the train tracks. The President, Tess and DeeDee emerge as heroes. DeeDee even finds true love with Cal, who survived his accident (of course).
Note: In a tradition dating back to the 1978 Burt Reynolds stuntman comedy film “Hooper” (a quasi-inspiration for the Lee Majors TV series, “The Fall Guy”), the end credits show the movie’s many bloopers.
The End.
Summing It Up
Just as the Wayans brothers’ “Scary Movie” comedy franchise is uniquely tuned to horror fans, “Stop! That! Train!” is uniquely painted in the bright colors, bawdy humor and over-the-topness of drag culture. Anyone not onboard with that might as well disembark now–this movie is not for you.

This silly, 90-minute romp was shot in Los Angeles over 19 days for under $20 million–a genuinely impressive feat these days. In the minuses column, the pacing of the movie’s middle act is a little uneven, as the control station scenes could’ve easily been trimmed by a few minutes. Some of the jokes and cameos really land, while others don’t. Nevertheless, the plusses of this breezy “Airplane!”-inspired farce outweigh its few minuses. With its appropriately bright, colorful and stagey cinematography by Luka Bazeli and deliberately cheesy digital FX, the movie thoroughly embraces its campy artifice. Beyond the bawdy jokes, colorful costumes and spontaneous music numbers, there is also surprising sincerity to the Laverne & Shirley-esque friendship between Tess (Ginger Mini) and her bestie, DeeDee (Jujubee). Coproducer RuPaul, as President Judy Gagwell, is more than “aight” with her queen-diva stature and presence.

“Stop! That! Train!” is a wicked, silly, high-camp disaster/action movie spoof that might not be everyone’s lavender iced latte, given American leadership’s increasingly draconian attitudes towards LGBTQ+ rights recently (and women’s healthcare, science, affordable housing, etc). However, if you’re open to something that’s perhaps out of your preassigned comfort zone, you might end up enjoying a few harmless laughs.
Where to Watch
As of this writing, “Stop! That! Train!” is still in theatrical release. Since Universal is distributing the film, it’s possible you’ll see it on Peacock streaming service when it goes digital, or on Universal Home Video if/when it arrives on physical media.

